Learned Helplessness in Relationships and Domestic Violence
In addition to education, learned helplessness comes up often for people focused on domestic violence. It’s often observed in relationships and in victims of domestic violence.
In fact, this phenomenon has helped us find an answer to some of the questions people have for victims who stay with their abusers, such as:
- Why didn’t they tell someone?
- Why didn’t they try to get help?
- Why didn’t they just leave?
It’s hard to explain the impact of abuse on the victim’s behavior. After all, observers might think it makes no sense that victims choose to stay with someone who is hurting them.
However, in cases of domestic violence and abuse, abusers often administer a series of “electrical shocks” (i.e., the form of abuse they subject their victims to) to acclimatize the victims to the abuse and teach them that they do not have control over the situation. The abusers maintain complete control, and the victims learn that they are helpless about their circumstances.
In such cases, it is easy to see how abuse can lead to learned helplessness, which can subsequently lead to a lack of motivation or effort to escape on the victim’s part. Just as the dogs in Seligman and Maier’s experiments learned that no matter what they did, they would be shocked, the victims of domestic violence and abuse learn that no matter what they do, they will always remain powerless and under the abusers’ control.
These perceptions are incredibly hard to shake, often requiring intensive therapy and support in order to shake them.
Based on learned helplessness, a specific theory was developed for victims of domestic violence called the theory of cyclic abuse, a cycle that is sometimes known as battered women syndrome. In this theory, a relationship in which domestic violence has occurred is likely to continually involve violence that’s doled out in a predictable and repetitious pattern.
This pattern generally follows this structure:
- Stage One: a period of tension-building in which the abuser starts to get angry, communication breaks down, and the victim feels the need to concede and submit to the abuser;
- Stage Two: the acting-out period, in which the abuse occurs;
- Stage Three: the honeymoon period, in which the abuser may apologize, show remorse, and/or try to make up for the abuse. The abuser might also promise never to abuse the victim again or, alternatively, blame the victim for provoking the abuse;
- Stage Four: the calm period, in which the abuse stops, the abuser acts like it never happened, and the victim may start to believe the abuse has ended and the abuser will change (Rakovec-Felser, 2014).
Viewed from this perspective, it’s not surprising that many victims of domestic violence develop learned helplessness. When the abuse is inflicted upon them in a continuing cycle, no matter what they do, they are likely to feel completely helpless and unable to avoid the abuse.
The theory of cyclic abuse posits that not only will abuse victims feel helpless, they will also:
- Re-experience the battering as if it were recurring even when it is not;
- Attempt to avoid the psychological impact of battering by avoiding activities, people, and emotions;
- Experience hyperarousal or hypervigilance;
- Have disrupted interpersonal relationships;
- Experience body image distortion or other somatic concerns;
- Develop sexuality and intimacy issues (Rakovec-Felser, 2014).
Clearly, learned helplessness is a serious and urgent concern for victims of domestic violence and other abuse. Luckily, there are some ways to treat learned helplessness (see the section on treatments).
Learned Helplessness: The Book
The book Learned Helplessness: A Theory for the Age of Personal Control was written by psychologist Christopher Peterson along with the first researchers to study learned helplessness, Maier and Seligman.
It chronicles the studies that prompted the theory of learned helplessness and provides a cogent and comprehensive summary of the research up to the book’s publication (in 1995) on the phenomenon. It outlines the connection between learned helplessness and depression as well as investigating other facets, like the cognitive and biological aspects.
If you are looking for a deeper dive into this topic, this book will provide you with an informative overview of learned helplessness. You can find it for purchase here.
A Possible Cure—Potential Treatments for Children and Adults
While learned helplessness can be hard to overcome, there exist promising treatments to address it in humans (and in other animals, for that matter).
One potential treatment based on neuroscience research is the relationship between the ventromedial prefrontal cortex (a part of the brain that plays a role in the inhibition of emotional responses) and the dorsal raphe nucleus (a part of the brainstem associated with serotonin and depression) and learned helplessness (Maier & Seligman, 2016).
This potential treatment may focus on stimulating the ventromedial prefrontal cortex and inhibiting the dorsal raphe nucleus through medication, electrical stimulation, or trans-magnetic stimulation, or psychologically through therapy.
Trans-magnetic stimulation (TMS) in particular has been shown in recent studies to be quite effective in the treatment of depression (Mayo Clinic, 2017). Given the link between learned helplessness and depression, it makes sense to think that a treatment for one may be an effective treatment for the other.
Speaking of effective treatments for depression, therapy is also a good choice for people struggling with learned helplessness. Those who feel helpless can benefit from working with a licensed mental health professional to explore the origins of their helplessness, replace old and harmful beliefs with newer and healthier beliefs, and develop a healing sense of compassion for themselves (Thompson, 2010).
Insightful research from psychologist Carol Dweck (the researcher who went on to propose the theory of growth vs. fixed mindset) showed that there is another extremely effective way to alleviate learned helplessness: through failure.
In Dweck’s 1975 study on the subject, participants (who all experienced extreme reactions to failure) were split into two groups: one received intensive training in which they failed tasks and were instructed to take responsibility for their failure and attribute it to a lack of effort, while the other group received intensive training in which they only experienced success.
The results showed that those in the success-only treatment group showed no improvement in their extreme reactions to failure, while the group that failed showed a marked improvement.
This experiment was one of several studies throughout the 1970s, 1980s, and 1990s that laid the foundation for a new theory of human behavior related to failure, learned helplessness, and resilience.
Seligman’s Learned Optimism Model
Seligman—one of the researchers who helped discover the learned helplessness phenomenon—later found his attention drawn to what is perhaps the complete opposite of learned helplessness: optimism.
Although Seligman’s name was synonymous with learned helplessness for many years, he knew he had a lot more to offer the world. His work on the subject led him to wonder what other mindsets and perspectives can be learned and whether people could develop positive traits instead of developing feelings of helplessness.
Seligman’s research led him to create the model of learned optimism. He found that, through resilience training, people can learn to develop a more optimistic perspective.
Similar to other positive psychology frameworks, such as the PERMA model—which highlights positive emotions, engagement, relationships, meaning, and accomplishment as pillars of wellbeing—learned optimism offers a pathway for replacing helplessness with strengths-based thinking.
This ability has been observed in children, teachers, members of the military, and more (Seligman, 2011).
It might not be as easy to learn optimism as it is to learn helplessness, but it can be done. If you’re interested in learning more about optimism and how it can be learned, check out Seligman’s book Learned Optimism: How to Change Your Mind and Your Life at this link. In addition to getting a brief overview of the research on this subject, you will also read about several simple techniques you can apply to develop a more positive and self-compassionate explanatory style.
Relevant Tests, Scales, and Questionnaires
Although many people have included measures of learned helplessness in their studies, they are often informal measures. However, there are two measures that have been used fairly often and/or recently.
The Learned Helplessness Scale (LHS) was developed by Quinless and Nelson (1988) to capture and calculate a score for learned helplessness. The scale is composed of 20 items rated on a scale from 1 (strongly agree) to 4 (strongly disagree). The minimum score on this measure is 20 and the maximum score is 80, with higher scores indicating a greater degree of learned helplessness.
The Learned Helplessness Questionnaire (LHQ) was created in Sorrenti and colleagues’ 2014 study on learned helplessness and mastery orientation. The LHQ consists of 13 items rated on a scale from 1 (not true) to 5 (absolutely true), for a total possible score between 13 and 65. An example item from this scale is the statement, “When you encounter an obstacle in schoolwork you get discouraged and stop trying. You are easily frustrated.”
If you’d like to use any of these scales for research purposes, please refer to the original scale development article for more information.
Relevant YouTube Videos
There are a number of great talks on learned helplessness and/or learned optimism for you to peruse.
For example, Martin Seligman’s TED Talk titled The New Era of Positive Psychology has become a classic, and for good reason. You can watch it here:
What our readers think
An excellent article. It’s a veritable source bank. Thank you!
So helpful!
Hi, isn’t it true that SF Maier and M. Seligman say that actually helplessness is not learned, but default?
“The mechanism of learned helplessness is now very well-charted biologically and the original theory got it backwards. Passivity in response to shock is not learned. It is the default, unlearned response to prolonged aversive events and it is mediated by the serotonergic activity of the dorsal raphe nucleus, which in turn inhibits escape. This passivity can be overcome by learning control, with the activity of the medial prefrontal cortex, which subserves the detection of control leading to the automatic inhibition of the dorsal raphe nucleus. So animals learn that they can control aversive events, but the passive failure to learn to escape is an unlearned reaction to prolonged aversive stimulation. In addition, alterations of the ventromedial prefrontal cortex-dorsal raphe pathway can come to subserve the expectation of control. ”
Maier, S. F., & Seligman, M. E. P. (2016). Learned helplessness at fifty: Insights from neuroscience
This proposed framework identifies the cause of at least one type of depression—that which stems from helplessness—and provides the path to a cure for it. The researchers outlined four strategies for treating helplessness-related depression (Abramson, Seligman, & Teasdale, 1978):
(…)
These strategies will be covered in more detail later.
Where can I find the details of these strategies?
Hi Valeria,
Thanks for your question! Toward the end of the article, the author outlined potential treatments for children and adults under the heading ‘A Possible Cure’.
Alternatively, you can also read the original article here for more information on treating helplessness-related depression.
I hope this helps!
Kind regards,
-Caroline | Community Manager